As of this morning, my cell phone service was disconnected for the first time in many years. That means I've gone 15 months paying the bill without a full time job, only to have my phone shut off a week before my first payday at the new job. Luckily, my last paycheck from the interim temp job should be enough to pay the past-due amount, and that arrives in my bank account some time around bar-close tonight.
It's become clear over these first few days of training that 16 weeks is too long. I'm more than happy to be collecting a paycheck without being in the productive stream, but they hired a dozen people with years, in some cases decades of industry experience, and it's still taking a half a day to get through the course on the search function on the help menu of one of the dozen or so programs that we'll be using on the job.
I'm not unsympathetic to the fact that many of those dozen people are old enough to have a difficult time setting the clock on their VCRs. And to, you know... still own VCRs.
There is, apparently, between the several corporate websites and the intranet databases available to employees, a vast amount of information available to me about my new job. Among this sprawling treasure trove of data, however, there seems to be no sign of a map of the building where I work, especially one marking the location of a damn drinking fountain. Every office building in the western world has a drinking fountain outside every pair of public restrooms, but in the corporate cathedral to healthcare consumerism where I now spend 40 hours a week, there isn't even a water cooler to be found.
I don't care; I'll drink from the toilet before I spend $1.35 on a bottle of water.
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